If you had to do it all over again, how would you reinvent your life?
The pain faded with the light and I blinked in total darkness. I used to roll my eyes whenever someone would say it was so dark they couldn’t see their own hand in front of their face, but I truly could not. I may as well not have had hands at all. Or a face. I could feel nothing within the void.
How had I come there? The pain. I had been shot. Was I dead? Was this purgatory? I had expected… I don’t know, more. With nothing but darkness all around me, I couldn’t make out any particular direction. I did not like it.
A pinprick of light appeared in my periphery. I focused on it like a drowning man clinging to driftwood. It grew, larger and larger, until it exploded in front of me. Giant white letters. Words.
START OVER
Y / N
“Start over”? Start what over? My life? Was it all just a game?
I stare at the options for a long time. What if I say no? Will I be trapped in the void forever? Will I move on to some other place, a more traditional afterlife?
I could start over though. Reinvent my life. I could make better choices. I could save myself from the tragedy that got me here in the first place. I could live to be an old man instead of a washed up twenty-something with no future. I could save the one I loved.
I hesitate over the “Y.” What if I go through with this and make all the same mistakes? What if I don’t remember anything and end up right back where I started?
No.
I have to do this. For Sam. If nothing else, I have to protect Sam.
I reach for the “Y” and am surprised to find I still have a physical body. I press it and the words explode into white once more. I fall through the light and hear a baby crying.
Notes: This was a weird little scene that popped into my head when I was thinking about this prompt. I wanted to go a “respawn” route or a futuristic “end of life care facility” where you have the option to do exactly as the prompt suggests and re-do your life. It certainly brings up some interesting questions. Like will you remember your mistakes so as not to make them again? And what about world events? Would you still remember those and be able to warn people?
I was talking about it with my husband over dinner and decided the one thing I would likely do differently would be to go to Clarkson sooner and start my college career as an engineer instead of a math major. And get better study habits. I wonder how different my life would be if I’d gone that route from the start. Not that I have any regrets. My life has turned out pretty sweet.
I hope you all had a great Monday. I’ve got one more day of vacation before heading back to work and it’s going to rain most of the day, but at lest the heat has finally broken. Looking forward to sleeping with the windows open again! Have a great night! I’ll see you tomorrow!
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Closet Full of Notebooks 